You must be always positive if you’re a coach

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Someone said this statement to me earlier on this week and I thought it was interesting.

Just because I’m a coach doesn’t mean I don’t have days where I’m negative, and feel sorry for myself. I think it’s unrealistic to think you can be happy and positive all the time. Bad things happen to people. And so does negativity. We’re bombarded everywhere we look and turn with negative images on the TV, internet, news etc.

So it’s hard to get away from negativity. And yet it’s so worthwhile to try being positive despite this. You see things clearer, you’re less stressed, you see challenges and opportunities where before there was failure and bad results. You’re fitter, healthier inside and out and your life follows the path you choose rather than react to.

I also think, however, that there’s times where you’ve to accept the dichotomy of life (contrasting things that are seen as being entirely different). For there to be night there has to be day, for there to be light there has to be darkness. And I think this applies to life too, some days are just shit and that’s fine. Some days you’re tired and just want to watch TV. That’s fine too. I think as long as you do your best on each day that’s ok!

Our best one day might be a 10/10, and the next be a 4/10. You might’ve given your all and for that day that was all you could’ve done. Giving out to yourself or beating yourself up for that doesn’t make sense – and can reduce the results you get on the following day!

So give yourself a break if you’re feeling negative some days. It’s ok – just focus on some of the positive habits, like practicing gratitude, reminding yourself of your goals, taking some kind of action towards your goals, and you will come out the other side.

I think too often we think if our thoughts are negative, that there’s something wrong with us. I also think there’s people out there, that take their identity from complaining about things and giving out, and making sure everyone knows that there’s things to complain about! If you complain about things it’s because you realise there’s something better available – why aren’t you taking action towards making the changes necessary? Complaining about the traffic? Take the bus and read! Complaining about the weather, move country. Complaining about whatever – what can you do to make a change?

Stop complaining – start doing something. And be as happy as you can be on the day.

Positive thoughts won’t weed the garden, taking action will. Success is doing what needs to be done whether you FEEL like it or not. So take action. eventually your mood will rise to meet the good things you’re doing for yourself so go easy on yourself at times you’re negative, good things are still to come 🙂

Your coach,

Phil

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